A Turkey Day Toast To The Male Harem

Wild Turkey Hunting.

Wild Turkey Hunting.

With the season of the turkey upon us, 45 million are about to be sacrificed at the altar of familial harmony this Thanksgiving. But as America gathers round the holiday table – moms and dads, grandparents and in-laws, exes and step-kids – to carve up and devour the stuffed and tethered foul, The Sultanette gratefully raises a glass to the members of The Male Harem who have so nourished her life. Not a turkey among them!

That’s not to say that a few turkeys haven’t infiltrated the harem along the way. And so I first offer some helpful tips for recognizing the genus meleagris, in the hope that learning from my mistakes, you may avoid similar pitfalls. Read more . . .


The Sultanette And The City

LATEST EPISODE: Pheromones released at a downtown gallery make for an orgy of creative intercourse on a November Sunday afternoon.

NewYorkNYSkylineBlimpIn case you were thinking that the life of The Sultanette is all high glam and male attentions put yourself in her stilettos on a bleak and solitary Sunday afternoon in November when the first icy winds signal the end of the City’s world-class autumn weather. Still clinging to that fantasy, I’d foolishly worn only a thin leather jacket to make the subway trek to the Lower East Side. Read more . . .


Notice: To Those With An Appetite For More

images-1The Sultanette has been knee-deep in a tantalizing foray that strikes to the marrow of Male Harem maintenance: The fine art of kicking ass and taking names, mainly her own. So as I hit a new stride, I offer a tempting assortment of new topics to tease you along this precarious, erotic and invigorating path of self-discovery.

imgres-1Stay tuned fellow chain-jerkers, chop-busters, and cage-rattlers for future confections to chew on including: the joy of risk (savored only when you discover what’s next after you think you’ve lost everything); the exquisite pain of happiness (nirvana being not all it’s cut out to be); the power of making a world-class exit (only one carry-on of emotional baggage, please); and the thrill of cerebral foreplay (synapses and the single girl). Read more . . .


Whose monogamy is it anyway?

Image credit: InSapphoWeTrust

The Leggo Wedding. Image credit: InSapphoWeTrust.

So let’s dive into the mother of them all, that cherished myth of the committed couple – monogamy.  At least it was mine for sixteen years with One and Only until I realized that though he wasn’t cheating on me physically, he’d been carrying on a liaison dangereuse with his past – a twenty-five year constipation over an insidious betrayal he’d never resolved. (Translation: baggage.) He denied it.  He had to.  He’d been deftly abused and lacked the metal or the wiles for right-sizing himself.  So when I realized I was participating in a relationship with the ghost of his past I made a break for the present. Read more . . .


The Male Harem FAQs

Mata Hari.

Mata Hari.

In response to the relentless inquiries among friends, strangers, and soulmates concerning the how’s and who’s of The Male Harem, below is a compendium of most frequently asked questions.

Q:  Do you have sex with all of them?

A:  I may be The Sultanette but I’m not Mata Hari.

Q: Then what’s the point?

A: Happy to say this answer has eluded only one would-be member of The Male Harem, call him The Judge for his litigation creds in the courts of law. (Harem descriptions slightly modified to ensure anonymity.) Installed in his rural idyll where we’d been introduced by his well-meaning wife at a charity event, The Judge suggested he drive into the city for lunch to discuss a book project he was dabbling in. The next week at Blue Water Grill on Union Square, I offered writing advice, then broached the subject of The Male Harem, curious to see if this country gent would be shocked.  Au contraire, The Judge’s immediate response was an enthusiastic, “I’d like to join!” The Male Harem wasn’t a club to be joined, I explained, but an experience to be cultivated. Objection overruled, he suggested we reconvene for lunch next week, venue TBD. Read more . . .